What is Emotional Intelligence and How to Develop it For Your Career Success
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Do you know people who are good communicators showing an empathetic understanding of how others feel and think?
Do you know people who not only understand their own strengths and weakness but also work effectively with others and get the best out of their team?
Do you know people who are good at making decisions, and stay calm under stressful situations?
These are the people who have a high degree of Emotional Intelligence (EI). They know themselves well and are good at understanding the emotional needs of others. As EI is increasingly recognised as an essential skill for professionals, managers, and leaders, more organisations are placing more emphasis in developing EI in their employers and use EI as part of the hiring and assessment process.
What is Emotional Intelligence?
So what is EI exactly? American psychologists John Mayer and Peter Salovey were the first two authors who coined the term “Emotional Intelligence” in the early 1990s and they defined EI as “the ability to monitor one’s own and other’s emotions, to discriminate among them and to use this information to guide one’s thinking and act”.
Several years later, Daniel Goleman populated the term EI in business through his best-selling book “Emotional Intelligence: Why It Matters more than IQ”. Goleman defined EI as “the capacity for recognising our own feelings and those of others, for motivating ourselves, for managing emotions well in our relationships “. Goleman proposed four components of EI skills:
- Self-awareness: the ability to understand and recognise your own emotions and how it affects your interactions with others;
- Self-regulation: the ability to use the awareness of your emotions to manage them in such a way to generate positive interactions with others and motivate yourself;
- Social awareness: this allows you to accurately read situations and people because can understand and empathise with their emotions;
- Social skills: this includes influencing skills, communication skills, change and conflict management, teamwork and collaboration, which are key competencies that enable the manager or leaders to deal with day to day needs of others.
Why EI matters to your career success?
Decades of research have supported the important role of EI in professional and leadership success. A higher level of EI has been positively associated with the better job and team performance, improved productivity, reduced level of stress, improved working and personal relationships. In an international study of 515 senior executives conducted by Egon Zehnder International, EI was a better predictor of success than either relevant previous experience or high IQ.
EI is also recognised as an essential skill that makes better manager and leaders. A 2010 study by Hays Group shows EI competencies make up to 80 to 100 percent of the distinguishing competencies of outstanding leaders. Furthermore, EI also provides valuable foundation when it comes to adapting to cross-cultural contexts in business, as a recent study shows EI as a predictor of cultural adjustments for success in global business assignments.
How to develop Emotional Intelligence?
You might wonder: can EI be developed? The answer is yes. While there is a generic component to EI, studies have shown that EI is trainable and can be developed over time. Here are some top tips to develop EI:
- Observe your emotional response and identify your emotional trigger. When you notice distressing emotions arising, take a pause and observe what is happening: What emotions are you feeling? Can you name it? Where do you feel it in your body? What types of people or situations tend to trigger your emotional response? Keeping an EI journal to reflect on these questions regularly, or practising mindfulness to train your attention inwards are useful avenues to develop your self-awareness. When you become aware of your emotions, you are less likely to be hijacked or controlled by it.
- Acknowledge the cause of your emotions. How you feel are closely linked to your thoughts and beliefs. Some common thinking errors can result in irrational emotional responses. For example, if you are feeling anxious about missing a work deadline because you’re worried that you might get fired if you don’t make it – you’re falling into the thinking pattern of “catastrophising” by imagining the worst possible scenario. Other common thinking errors include “all or nothing” thinking where you see things as black or white with no middle ground or “filtering” where you focus only on the negative and discount the positive. Once you’re aware of these thinking patterns, you can start to examine and challenge them. Ask yourself: is there any evidence for a particular thought? Against it? What could be an alternative way of seeing things?
- Take responsibility for your response. You can’t choose what happened to us, but you can choose how you respond. People with higher EI know they have the ability to choose how to think, act and feel, even in difficult situations. If you have a tight deadline, you can see it as an opportunity for you to take up the challenge and learn how to prioritise better. If you have a disagreement with a colleague, you can see it as a chance to share different perspectives and come up with a solution.
- Seek consistent feedback. Unlike our rational brain, the emotional brain is a much slower learner and developing EI skills requires consistent practice and feedback. In addition to your own self-reflection, you will also benefit from building a feedback system to help you develop EI skills. Whether it is regular conversations with your boss and mentor, or working with a coach, gaining external support can help uncover those “blind spots” that you might otherwise not see yourself.
As you gain more practice in developing your EI skills, you will get to know yourself better, stay in tune with your own and others’ emotional states, communicate and collaborate more effectively, and build better relationships. Practising EI skills will not only contribute to your career success by making you a better colleague, manager and leader but also help you be happier and more fulfilled by becoming a better friend, partner or parent in your life.
Now over to you. I’d love to hear from you what you think are the most important EI skills in your career and leadership? What specific actions will you take to develop and enhance your EI skills from today? Please do share your comments below!
With love,
Jessie
References:
Salovey, P., & Mayer, J. D. (1990). Emotional intelligence. Imagination, cognition and personality, 9(3), 185-211.
Goleman, D. P. (1995). Emotional intelligence: Why it can matter more than IQ for character, health and lifelong achievement.
Shmueli Gabel, R., Dolan, S. L., & Luc Cerdin, J. (2005). Emotional intelligence as predictor of cultural adjustment for success in global assignments. Career Development International, 10(5), 375-395.
